Driving 101 - The Driver License - California Version

This is what your license LOOKS like:

This is what your license MEANS (NOT a legal version, just my translation):

California State-Approved Contract of Performance
(California Driver License)

This contract is held legally binding, as authorized by the California Vehicle Code and the California Municipal Courts, to wit:

1) The parties to this contract are as follows: the individual named on the identifying photocard, issued by the Department of Motor vehicles (hereinafter called "driver"), the State of California (hereinafter called the "State", the Department of Motor Vehicles (hereinafter called "DMV"), and the people of the State of California, as represented by the California Court System (hereinafter called "people", or "other drivers").
2) The parties, by signature or official form, hereby agree to abide by the covenants contained within this contract, under penalty of perjury and/or other criminal punishments.
3) Each party agrees to abide by the individual responsibilities set forth in the ensuing paragraphs, as established by either case law, rules set forth in the California Codes of Law, or as may be established by the courts, acting on behalf of the people.

RESPONSIBILITIES and OBLIGATIONS:

1) The State agrees to provide a system of roads and highways for a driver to operate a motor vehicle upon. This system shall include, but is not limited to:
a. Signage – guidance, information, adherence to speed and traffic laws, parking, and other such signs deemed necessary for the public safety;
b. Traffic Control Devices – traffic signals, varying lights and/or signs indicating motion permitted or denied, road markings to indicate lane usage, safe passage, and mandated motion lanes (turn only, no turn, etc.).
c. Road Markings – generally, lines (either painted or reflective tape) to indicate traffic direction, traffic control, road variances, prohibitions or restrictions (painted curbs, zebra-striped safety zones, etc.), arrows or words indicating to a driver approved or prohibited speeds or direction.
d. Law enforcement – a system of officers, vehicles, and guidelines for enforcing any and all laws of the state as they pertain to the public safety of the State’s citizenry and other drivers.

2) The DMV agrees to provide a systematic set of rules and policies directly related to the licensure of drivers, registration of vehicles, and other operations that directly affect the driving public. These rules and policies shall include, but are not limited to:
a. A printed set of guidelines and policies that shall be used throughout the state for testing new drivers seeking to obtain this contract. While minor, geographical differences may arise, the testing shall be administered so as to be equivalent in all areas of the state.
b. A method of informing the people of what these basic guidelines and policies are. Such method can include publications, telephone help lines, internet web sites, or other methods deemed, by the DMV, to be effective in communicating to the public.
c. A policy of maintaining a record of driver violations of this contract, as well as a sliding scale of violations leading to the eventual revocation of this contract. This policy, once installed, must be explained to the public, under a "right-to-know", to help ensure compliance with this contract.
d. A method whereby a driver, having had this contract revoked, can work towards re-establishing another contract, upon which the above-mentioned policies and guidelines would be re-instituted.
 
3) The driver agrees to adhere to any policies, laws, and procedures set forth by the other parties of this contract. In fulfilling this contract, the driver is commanded to refrain from any action that is detrimental to the safety of the general public, and to the driving public in particular. These actions include, but are not limited to:
a. Maintaining a safe vehicle for operation on the roads. The driver (not necessarily the owner) of a vehicle is expected to know the operational safety condition of the vehicle he or she is driving.
b. Maintaining an alert and responsive self-demeanor. This may exclude driving while fatigued, driving under high emotional distress, driving while influenced, even partially, by medications, drugs, or alcohol.
c. Maintaining a conscious effort to be aware of other drivers, and effectively sharing the road with them. This may exclude such as activities as cellular phone use, unusually loud music, distractions such as reading, overt conversations, or any other activity which detracts from the drivers’ total awareness of the driving environment.
d. Refraining from operating a motor vehicle which reflects no financial responsibilities (insurance), validated contract for driving, or improper registration as outlined by the DMV.

I understand the above responsibilities and obligations, and agree with them, as witnessed by my signature below. I also understand that, in addition to revocation of this contract, violations may lead to criminal actions against myself, and monetary punishments.